Get a Clue

Is there a "Clue" board game pro-circuit? If so, I should totally be on it. (Right after my monopoly tour). I mean, come on. Getting it right on the very first turn? (By the way, it was Miss Scarlet, with the Knife, in the Study). All skill. There's money to be made here.

When I'm Postmaster General . . .

So, I get a letter from Mother (no, this one was not on Hello Kitty! stationery for some reason), informing me that new stamp rates are taking effect on May 14. WTF? Didn't we just raise the price to 39¢ a year ago ? Why yes, yes we did. Now, I need to use up these stamps I have, or purchase a bunch of 2¢ stamps, like I'm some kind of philatelist? (Yeah, that's right. Look it up.)

So here's the deal. One day, when I become Postmaster General, much like my good friend, Samuel Osgood (above), I will vow to have longer gaps between postage hikes. And none of this 2¢ hiking, either. If they're going to nickel and dime us to death, they might as well have the moxy to nickel and dime us, literally. That way, if they want, they can increase the rate by a dime every 5 years (or however else to make it economically feasible). This current rate is just ridiculous. Who is with me in the Revolution? As an added bonus, I would like to reinstate the Pony Express. Basically, it would just be me on a pony. His name is Patches.

Now, don't get me started on when I become Treasurer of the United States. Your days are numbered, Pennies. Worthless little bastards.

Summer Lovin'
DOJ Style

I've received confirmation from the US Attorney's Office in Milwaukee that my background check has cleared! Yay! This is shaping up to be a good-looking summer (of course, all of my summers are good-looking). I'll be flying in to Milwaukee on May 17, where I can visit my Marquette friends while working on the Harvard Law Review Competition. Then, I will be starting work bright and early on Monday, June 4. Right after my brief foray into Mississippi . . .

This is what's wrong with law students.





So, I'm in the library on a Saturday afternoon, working diligently on a paper (ha!). As I go to the bathroom, I am struck to find a man brushing his teeth at the sink. Seriously? That's not right. For one, oral hygiene belongs in certain places. The library bathroom is not one of them. Of course, on the other end of the hygiene-spectrum (infrahygiene, if you will), you have individuals who don't wash their hands in the bathroom. Come on! But that's another rant for another day.

If you need to brush your teeth in the library, something is wrong. For your own sake, get the hell out of Langdell. Go home. It's bad enough that it's a gorgeous day, without a cloud in the sky, and it's finally broken 60º. Now, I have all these questions in my head, distracting me from my work. My very important work. Are you telling me you spend so much time in the library that you brought toothbrush and toothpaste? Was this a one-time thing, or does this person always take an oral hygiene kit to the library? Every day? I mean, it was in the middle of the afternoon, when most people don't brush their teeth. Does this guy have OCD about brushing his teeth, or is he just a regular weirdo? Does he know that by overbrushing he can damage his gums? Which can lead to heart problems. Trust me on this one.

* * *

Later, as I saw this individual talking to some of his friends in the library, I heard him speaking French. That explains it. F-ing LLM's.

Ames Moot Court

Or "Go Team Norbit!"

Well, after the entire semester of research, drafts of briefs, moot-moot courts, and countless hours debating what shirt and tie combination would look best with my new navy, pinstripe suit, the hour arrived. Oral arguments!

For those of you not familiar, allow me to briefly explain. For our legal research and writing class, we are given a scenario: John Dorian (the characters were all named after Scrubs characters, including District Judge Janitor), a student at "Holmes University" in the make-believe district of Ames (a district with absolutely no precedent or case law, so every question is one of first impression, unless it's been decided by the Supreme Court), has been convicted of possession of cocaine. We are given a condensed record of the trial and the issues on appeal (4th amendment search and seizure by a private security guard and 6th amendment right of a pro se defendant to have access to a law library). It is our job to brief these two issues and then argue them before a panel of circuit "judges." Silvia and I (aka "Team Norbit") represented Mr. Dorian, while Kendall and Jessie represented the United States.

The actual oral arguments were really quite a bit of fun. I was worried what judges we would get. Our panel was actually quite nice. But that didn't mean they were easy. They asked some really good questions. And they gave some good feedback at the end.

While the oral arguments were an ungraded portion of a pass/fail course, they were a lot of fun. It makes me think that I really am cut out for this "lawyer thing"! Yay!

"I Want to Be a Producer . . ."

and I am! Thanks to the 3.5 hour long HLS Drama Society Elections (oh, they were nothing compared to NRHH), I'm going to co-produce the fall show with Ariel. Yay! So, begin submitting your suggestions. Musical or play? Interested in being director? Musical director? Choreographer? Let me know! I'm excited for a fantastic upcoming year! Now to finish the current one . . .

Vanitas

I am now up to 4 grey hairs. (Last count on 1/24/07 was 3 grey hairs and 1 bad Salt-N-Pepa joke). What does this mean? That the stress of law school is causing me to grey prematurely? Possibly. That I spend too much time in front of the mirror? More likely.

Hey, being this man-pretty has its price.

Happy Easter!

Ah, finally. After the long wait, the glorious day has arrived: where I can once again celebrate the Greatest Miracle. Coffee. I forgot how much I missed it, how miserable I was in the mornings without it. I would wake up, expecting it to be there, and would be so disappointed to realize it was gone. But there is a happy ending! We have returned, like old lovers rekindling their passion. And I don't mean "elderly" lovers because that's gross. Nobody wants to see that. Except maybe Teddy, or his Indian version, Savith. Or maybe Teddy is the White Savith. Hmmm... See? I have coffee in my system once again, and I continue to the incessant, nonsensical rambling. Oh, how I've missed it.

Anyway, Easter was a wonderful day, even if it was colder than on Christmas (according to Kendall, according to the weatherman). I started the day off by going to Mass with Kendall and her mom, who was visiting for the weekend. Then, I made dinner (lemon/garlic marinated pork tenderloin, herb-seasoned potatoes, and apple/Manchego cheese salad... quite tasty) for Savith, Katie, Chris, Jordan, and me. Then it was off to the library where I tried to focus. This proved to be rather difficult, since I had eaten so much food, I thought I was going to die. Topped off with my 3rd cup of coffee for the day. And after a 40-day hiatus, it packs a punch.

Well, now that I have reunited with my dark-roasted Love, I suppose I no longer have an excuse for being grumpy, not getting work done, or taking long naps. What have I done?

Spring is in the Air

Ah . . . the signs of spring. The ice skating rink has been taken down, replaced with sand volleyball. Landscapers are bustling around campus, digging and planting. I no longer have to trudge through snow. Now, if only the temperature were above 40º and a little sun would shine. But hey, clearly that's less important than the volleyball thing.